I’m all about living consciously – making decisions with full attention to the moment I’m living in, as well as the way that moment is connected to the future.
When I finally saw the connection between my momentary urges for foodication (medicating through food) and the ultimate result in my body, I changed my weight permanently.
I’m focused on a lifestyle that ends the lease on weight loss and OWNS it instead. I emphasize making my own decisions instead of going with the crowd. I don’t like being a “sheeple.”
I’m convinced accepting the norm, programmed by the media, advertising and fashion industries, means lots of excess weight and fat in our lives.
Case in Point: McDonald’s new Sweet Iced Tea commercial where the woman has been sipping tea so long, she’s developed a tan line across her chin.
Yowza!
My first reaction was: “that’s the stupidest commercial I ever saw!”
No one would drink that much, right?
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Thanks for all the comments to the “Sick & Tired of ‘Food Decisions?'” post! Emails and tweets abounded. It was great to hear from you!
The quest for permanent weight loss MUST eventually become non-diet weight loss. Our willpower sooner or later deserts us. In fact, willpower was not equipped for long-range quests. In other words, diets have to morph into intelligent, sustainable lifestyles in order for the change to last. Diet mentality, on the other hand, has us yo-yo-ing our weight and repeatedly coming back for more dieting.
Many of the themes I heard from reader responses were from diet mentality and clearly centered on controlling food or controlling behavior with food, rather than focused on real needs. Let’s have a look:
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Talk about a “Food Decision” wall!! I hit it hard this week. Take a bit of fatigue and add several last-minute twists to a schedule that was a tad too tight in the first place, and all of a sudden food decisions become hard. I found myself saying, “I don’t want to DECIDE what to eat. It’s too much work. I just want someone to make dinner miraculously appear for my family and me.”
My clients describe this place of indecision and frustration a lot! Today, women work so hard in their careers and have so many additional responsibilities PLUS they are often expected to also fulfill the traditional “wife” duties of social planning, intra-family communication, scheduling, housework and meal planning/preparation. Overscheduling is a way of life. It can be a huge burden to carry.
The Food Decision Wall is that point when there’s nothing in the house to feed the kids except raw carrots and dog food and you’re seriously considering which would be more nutritious. It’s when you scream, “I NEED A WIFE!” It’s when you KNOW the best possible solution is to grab the phone for … FAST FOOD DELIVERY!
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If you haven’t seen it yet, there’s a very funny sketch from the April 10, 2010 Saturday Night Live featuring Tina Fey and her “brownie husband.”
Tina Fey and Brownie Husband from SNL
Food, especially those that heighten the senses like caffeine, sugar and chocolate, are often substitutes for connection, intimacy, and uncomfortable sexual feelings. Chocolate and sex produce similar emotional charges in the brain. “Brownie husband” is always available when we’re not in a partnership, or our key relationships are overstressed or poorly scheduled. Today’s over-busy world poses considerable challenge for the intimacy within relationships.
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What the world calls “weight loss” is a temporary condition based on a diet, not on real life. As I discovered, we pay for temporary weight loss with deprivation, excessive exercise, and, most importantly, we pay with the body’s precious metabolism. Then, we’re forced to give back the “weight loss” when we can’t support the payments anymore.
I call this “renting weight loss.” It’s prevalent in our society, and heartbreaking.
As I lost over 70 lbs. (and sustained that loss for 10 years), I learned a few things. Speaking at my 10th year celebration forced me to think about all my lessons from an overview perspective. It looked like this:
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When I look back at my weight loss, and my current healthy way of living, I see that what I ate was much less important than what was going on in my head.
I was a fat thinker.
It didn’t matter if I wanted to lose weight; I was never going to succeed until I changed thinking fat into thinking thin.
One of the things I did was examine the equations in my head from a different perspective, and bust them if they led to overeating, destructive attitudes, or feeling bad about myself.
Here are some examples:
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This past weekend, I led a wonderful seminar full of amazing women learning about permanent weight loss for the first time in their lives. Many of them had been focusing on food as a solution to excess weight for 10, 20, 30 years! It’s funny how we tend to doubt ourselves, rather than the methods foisted on us by commercial weight loss, doctors, trainers, diet gurus, etc. So often, we naturally assume we did “something wrong” when the diets fail time after time.
But this workshop was about changing our minds! And we did! Mindgames, be gone! We witnessed some major change to thinking patterns that get in the way of progress towards a healthy weight.
March 13 also officially marked my own 10th anniversary at my current weight after losing over 70 lbs. I very much wanted to be teaching others on this anniversary so the timing was perfect. I was looking forward to raising a glass of champagne with friends and clients but, when the time actually came, I was oddly emotional.
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This blog post is inspired by my fabulous twitter buddy, Shannon. She asked for input on a particular diet on twitter. Since I wanted to say more than my initial “under 140 characters” reply (“DON’T DO IT!”), I decided to share it here.
The diet program that caught Shannon’s eye was first popular about 12-14 years ago, right in the middle of my 4-year weight loss period.
I had lost about 65 lbs when I entered a 9 month training program. At that point, I didn’t think of my weight loss as tenuous and I was committed to the idea of permanence, but I still experienced lots of anxiety about it.
During our training, we had a lunchtime speaker come in and talk about fitness. “Oh, this will be interesting,” I thought. The man brought the book “Body for Life” by Bill Phillips and talked about how great it was. I rolled my eyes (kinda like this):
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- Confused? Most people are. All this is diet advice from the perspective of what I call Diet Mentality. Based in fea… https://t.co/oLbdhU6utw 10:36:02 AM March 29, 2019 ReplyRetweetFavorite
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- I've always said exercise is more important than food control. What do you think? https://t.co/nRyJeKMZ9y 09:46:44 AM March 09, 2019 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- Before and after pictures are usually complete fakes, and give us the misconception that the "after" picture is the… https://t.co/QUdTrITjeG 05:42:55 PM February 02, 2019 ReplyRetweetFavorite
- Take a look! Wisdom! https://t.co/zjh6DbmIh9 04:07:46 PM January 06, 2019 ReplyRetweetFavorite
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