Having traveled my own quite complicated journey out of body hatred and losing over 70 lbs permanently, I’ve come to believe every body is different and unique, though we’re led by society/culture to believe their is a “standard.” I’ve had the experience of coaching hundreds of women towards their own unique “optimal” weight, and discovered we all lose weight at different rates (and, yes, in different places!).

Loving and appreciating our own distinctiveness isn’t the easy road in our society, but it can be done.

I once had a client lose weight at a rate of a pound a month, and be upset

with that, until she realized she had gained weight at a rate of 3 lbs a year for 20 years. Even her doctor didn’t notice that slow accumulation of excess fat.

That meant her body was releasing weight faster than it had made it – a bargain!

At that rate, you can be sure she was burning fat too. Too-quick weight loss rebounds because it burns other aspects of the body, not just fat.

As her body began to “like” losing weight, she gained some momentum too. If she’d allowed herself to be discouraged by 1 pound a month, she would not have advanced to 2 pounds a month, etc. Her metabolism was becoming healthier!

She lost 52 of her excess 60 lbs. Because she was working on deeper level than a diet – changing her very attitudes and beliefs about nurturing herself, her physical body, and her life – she never reverted “off the diet” and regained weight. There was no plan to abandon and no allotted amounts of food, points or calories.

Other clients have lost less weight than those arbitrary charts (usually formulated by the life insurance industry, so convenient when you can charge people more based on their “risk factors”!) but found themselves feeling vibrant, healthy and powerful.

I’ve also seen clients lose to a prescribed “goal weight” assigned to them by a diet program and find they felt weak, lethargic and were often sick. That told them it was, in fact, NOT a good weight for them.

Here are some questions I ask clients when determining a healthy weight:

1. Is your body representative of you, your experience, your feelings? (Do you look in the mirror and say “YES! THAT’S ME!”?)

2. Do you feel proud of your body and value it?

3. Do you care for it with love and respect? (This includes nurturing it with food and exercise levels to which it responds positively.)

4. Do you have any unresolved feelings hiding in your body (fat loves to hold feelings that have not been processed)?

5. Do you have adequate levels of energy to produce what you want in life?

These five simple questions can help you determine your unique healthy weight.